Chakras and Relationships – Sahasrara

Sahasrara the crown chakra is our connection to source. There is pure Oneness at this level, as it is without the duality that exists at the level of the other chakras. If we think of chakras as levels of consciousness, as has been proposed in this series of articles, then the level of consciousness of Sahasrara is the experience of being aligned with and at one with all. We experience this in some states of meditation, when personality and ego drop away, and people regularly experience this during Psychedelic Assisted Therapy with Psilocybin or LSD.

At this level of consciousness there is a sense of understanding the timeless nature of existence, beyond the current body or personality.

When someone is at that level of consciousness, there isn’t a need to know or explain what it means to exist beyond the body or for death to have no meaning. It’s an understanding without words, dogma or spiritual philosophy and is instead a direct experience, that once had- cannot be unknown or forgotton.

Other chakras are described as being more or less activated or aroused. An individual may have strong awakening of one chakra and not much on another. Sahasrara isn’t understood like this. We all are born, live our lives and then die with Sahasrara fully connected to source. We cannot turn that off or make that connection bigger or smaller, regardless of how much practice we do. The difference then between us and enlightened Masters is that they are fully conscious and aware and in continuous relationship with that source connection.

The invitation with Sahasrara is to tune into, recognise and dedicate time to honour the connection we all have. We could know it as Source, Universe, God, Goddess, Oneness, Void, Nirvana or a million other names. As soon as we try to name and describe we move back into the consciousness of Ajna in the mind- to know, Anahata the heart, to love and be in relationship with that, or Manipura the will, wanting to be right about it. Yet at the level of Sahasrara there is no separation and those concepts become meaningless. We ARE that.

Being in a human relationship when one or both people have a deep awareness of this level of reality can of course be blissful. Especially if both have tools to move into that connected space together. Couples that meditate together often report being psychically connected even when they are miles apart. If one person has the awareness of source through Sahasrara and the other doesn’t, it can feel lonely. Sahasrara is beyond personality and ego, so the person who spends a lot of time at that level of consciousness can be quite detached, uninterested in worldly affairs or responsibilities. This feels amazing to be around, there is a sense of ‘being high’, but when bills arrive to be paid, or deadlines and responsibilities inevitably role around, the person living in Sahasrara won’t help and this can cause enormous frustrations and ruptures in relationships.

Ideally to live our best possible lives and thrive in relationships, we need all the levels of consciousness represented by the chakras to be available.

We need the grounding and stamina that our root, Muladhara brings to feel safe and secure in the world. We need some of the sensual, juicy, lushness that Svadistana- the sexual chakra brings to help us stay creative and have fun. We need the will power, discipline and confidence that Manipura, the navel chakra brings to help us be assertive and successful. We need the love, compassion, curiosity and awe that Anahata the heart chakra brings to stay connected in life. We need the ability to connect with our voice and our truth that Vishuddha, the throat chakra brings. We need the mental clarity, focus and concentration that Ajna, the third eye chakra brings. If you have the capacity to act from these different levels of consciousness and move between them in response to the circumstances you find yourself in, you will be a highly content and successful human, your relationships with others will flourish and you will be able to move with ease between many situations and circumstances. Sahasrara is the cherry on the cake. The awareness that none of it really matters as there is ultimately nothing separate or outside of oneself is deeply healing and comforting. May all humans have the grace and blessing to experience and know this deeply. As you read this, may you be happy and healthy and well.

 

Get off the Drama Triangle to Save your Relationship

When people relate to each other, we can get polarised into unhealthy positions that don’t make for a healthy, close connection. The Drama Triangle is one model that explains the mess we can sometimes get into with people we care about. The three parts of the triangle...

The Art of Couple Communication

When couples get stuck in unhelpful patterns of communication, often it’s not so much ‘what’ is being discussed but ‘how’ it is being discussed. If one partner has something on their mind that they want to share with the other, delivery is really important. For the...

Help! We’re not having Sex!

One of the most common reasons that individuals and couples seek out a sex therapist, is that they are not having much or any sexual intimacy.   Some people are A-sexual, meaning they don’t feel sexual desire and that’s just how they are, but for people who are...

Bringing Tantra into your Sex Life

  Tantra is a ritual that each person comes to with intention. Tantra (not the ancient yogic spirituality, but what is know as 'neo-tantra / new tantra) is a practice of making sex sacred. Instead of focusing on arousal or orgasms, the focus is on connection,...

5 Powerful Ways to Show More Appreciation

If all couples increased the amount of appreciation they showed each other, I would not have many relationship counselling clients! It doesn’t matter how good your communication skills are, how practiced you are at speaking without yelling and regulating the tone of...

Chores that are Bores, and the arguments they create

No-one is going to be surprised to hear that allocation of household chores is a common gripe and cause of arguments, and a hot topic in couple counselling sessions. I always let couples know that there is no ‘correct’ or ‘fair’ way to manage things, beyond what...

Mindful Masturbation for greater Ejaculation Control

Ejaculating within the first few ‘thrusts’ of penetrative sex can be frustrating! Clients attend sex therapy looking for a way to ‘last longer’ as they might be experiencing distressing feelings of shame, frustration and even avoiding sex. They have googled 'premature...

Arguments happening often? Try this.

Couples often seek relationship counselling because they are having lots of arguments. They love each other and hate feeling like this but are stuck in bad habits. Counselling can be a great support to unpack certain themes and stuck points. I hear all the time “This...

EMDR Therapy, An Attachment & IFS Informed Approach

EMDR Goes beyond Talk Therapy. Counselling is an effective step towards wellbeing. It helps to talk, but sometimes, despite all the talking and doing the ‘right’ things - nothing changes. This is where Transformative Trauma Therapies like EMDR Therapy come in. Every...

How to Feel Beautiful

The ancient Goddess and Earth Religions understood the sacredness of the body; they worshipped nature and embraced the cycles of birth, life and death. They saw beauty in the bloody mess of menstruation, sex, birth and death.Before Tantra came on the scene, most of...